User blog:TheDegrassiDiaries/It's Over
'''It's Over '''is the final chapter of the first volume of my fanfiction. It takes place during the events of Campbell Saunders' suicide. This is an extra long chapter since it is the final chapter. Plot Me and Winston are doing great. I feel like I'm the happiest girl on earth. He's such the sweetest boyfriend I've ever had. Well actually, I've never had a boyfriend before. He's so caring, that's what I love the most about him. I've had breakfast and now I grab my bag to leave for school. "Bye, mom," I say and give her a kiss on the cheek. "Bye, honey, have a nice day!" my mom says with a smile. I open the door and I'm ready to go. When I get to school, it doesn't seem like it's everyday Degrassi. There are police and firefighters there. I don't know what's going on. Ms. Dawes looks at me like something terrible happens. "What happend?" I ask her. Ms. Dawes sounds like she can't pronounce the words. "A student committed suicide", she answers hardly. I ask who and when I hear the answer, I can't believe my ears. Campbell Saunders, Maya's boyfriend. I wonder how she is. Probably crying her eyes out or something. But that's what I'm actually doing right now. Campbell was such a really nice guy. Why did he kill himself? I really feel bad for Maya. I'm trying to find Winston but he's nowhere in the crowd. "Where are you?" I text him. A teacher tells us to go home and all classes are canceled today and that there is a candle vigil this evening in honor of Cam. It's 7 PM. Everyone is crying because of what happend. Everybody's together for comfort. And I'm in the crowd at the vigil, alone. I texted Winston again but no answer. But then I see I'm not the only one. Zig is sitting on a bench. I see he has a black eye. Campbell fought him yesterday during Spirit Week. Zig is looking down like he's guilty. Zig. I haven't talked for months, because of the rumours Tori spread about me. I see him looking at me, almost crying. I start to feel bad for him now. He walks up to me. "Nicole". That's the only thing he says. "Zig", I say, as softly as he did. "Are you okay?" I ask. "Not really", he answers. "Do you wanna talk?" He nods his head like he trusts me. "Can we go somewhere else?" he asks. I know a place. The Boiler Room. I know it's locked ever since the events that occured last year. I don't know what happend, but I heard there were inappropriate acts there. But you never know. We're going to the back of the building since the front door is locked. To our surprise, it's open. I try to open the door to the Boiler Room and to our surprise again, it's not locked. Me and Zig walk down the stairs. It's really dark, but the fire makes some little light. "Here we are", I say. Zig doesn't say a word and he starts to cry again. "Hey, it's okay", I say, comforting him. "It's my fault!" he suddenly screams. "It's my fault he's gone!" I ask him why he thinks that. "I told him to get out of Maya's life, and he did", Zig answers, first hesitant like I would be mad at him. But I understand. Zig liked Maya and was jealous of her relationship with Cam, that's actually what Maya told me. Zig breaks down and sits down on the floor, crying. "Look, Zig", I say. "What you need is a friend right now. Just because what happend, doesn't mean you can isolate yourself from everyone. And I am here for you". I softly say the words and Zig seems to have calmed down. "Thanks, Nicole", he says. "You're such a good friend". Now I start to think. How can he say that? We haven't talked for months, because he ignored me like I was nothing. I really want to say how the hell he could say that, but I'd rather not too. "I know", I only say. I sit down and Zig stands up to sit next to me. "What's wrong?" he asks. "I actually don't know why you're being nice to me again, after you ignored me", I say, almost crying. "Oh, that", he says, feeling guilty. "I am so sorry Nicole. I shouldn't have believed Tori. You're not all those things she said and you don't have to feel that way. You're such a sweet girl, Nicole and when I realized that, I just wanted to hit myself because I felt like such an idiot". Zig gives me a smile and puts his arm around me to comfort me. "Thank you", I say softly, almost a whisper. It's 7.45 already. Me and Zig are doing nothing and we haven't said anything for a while. "Zig", I say. He looks up. "Do you wanna go back?" Zig doesn't seem to be in the mood to talk when I asked him that. "They see me as a bad person", he says, "they see me as the guy who murdered Cam. Nicole, I don't wanna go back there". He looks at me like he's scared. "But you can't spend the night here", I say as a joke, but still being serious. "Nicole", he then says. "If I would spend the night here, would you want to stay with me?" I can hear it in his voice that he is serious. I'm feeling bad for him. I would spend the night here too if I was that depressed. "Of course", I say, rubbing his back. I start to feel confused. My heart is pounding when he is talking. I had that feeling back when we were friends. Does this mean I still have feelings for him? But if so, what about Winston? He is sweet yes, but Zig... Then I get a message on my phone. It's Winston. "Sorry for the late reply, I'm outside. The vigil is about to begin, where are you?" Something in me says that I have to stay with Zig, so I put my phone away without actually knowing what I'm doing. It remains silent for a while. Me and Zig are sitting very close to each other, our legs are touching each other. He puts his head on my shoulder. I get this warm feeling. Like I wanna stay with him, forever in this boiler room. I suddenly start to cry again. "What is it?" Zig says, like he did something wrong. "Sorry", I say, "I don't know why I'm crying. I just seem to be so confused". I'm in such a huge dilemma right now. I think I'm still in love with Zig, but I love Winston too. "About what?" he asks. How can I tell him I actually have feelings for him? He knows I'm with Winston! But then, Zig gives me a kiss on the forehead. "It's okay, I'm here for you, Nicole". How he whispered those words in my ear, made me feel like I came to the conclusion. "Why did you kiss me", I ask. "Because I like you". Am I dreaming or did Zig really just say that? "I like you, Nicole, ever since I met you. You're the sweetest girl I know and you're so caring". I look into his eyes and he looks into mine. He leans over and gives me another kiss, this time on the lips. My heart starts to beat really fast. I feel like I want to have him very close, and when I say very close, I really mean it. We kiss like we are so in love, first slowly, but then we go faster. I actually love it. I have my hand under his shirt and he puts me down on the floor. We keep kissing. He kisses my neck and now we both know where we are going. It looks like it feels wrong, but I actually don't mind. I feel like I want do it too. It's getting hotter and the next thing I remember is that I feel his warm skin on mine. Now I know I can't go back. I open my eyes and look around like I just got a hang over. I look at my phone to see what time it is. 2 AM! I have 4 missed calls, two from Winston, two from Maya and a message from my mom. It says: "Hey sweety. I forgot to tell you, but your dad and I are outta town tonight. We come back tomorrow morning. I hope you don't mind to sleep alone. Love you xxx". I look around and see all my clothes are lying around. Luckily I still have my bra on, but now I start to wonder. Zig is laying next to me, asleep. He has no shirt on and all his clothes are lying around too. Let me think straight. We kissed, he took off his shirt, I took off my pants and we... Oh no. You can guess what we did. Zig opens his eyes. "What time is it?" he asks like he just awoke from a coma. "2 AM", I say. Zig pulls me down and puts his arm around me. His skin still feels so warm. He gives me a kiss on the forehead. "You're beautiful", he says. "I wanna stay up all night to be with you". I give him a smile. "I wanna stay too", I say softly. He still has his arms around me. "But I'm so tired", I say. "That's fine", he says. "Goodnight, my angel". I am so in love now. Zig turns around and when I close my eyes, I feel guilty. How could I be sleeping with Zig when I have a boyfriend? Maybe I have to break up with Winston, before he finds out the truth. I know I have to tell him eventually. But right now, I want to stay here with Zig and never let him go. Category:Blog posts